#3: How to Deal with Anger, and Frameworks for Good Communication

And can positive reframing ever go too far?

Author

Jon Brooks
November 10, 2022

🏹 Stoic Wisdom Arrows

📝 StoicAnixety Cheatsheet PDF: I created a 25-page ebook on anxiety that contains some of the most important principles to start overcoming this affliction. Download cheatsheet here.

​😡 A Simple Guide to Stoic Anger-Management: Stoic writer Donald Robertson gives a very concise but practical summary of 10 anger-management techniques used by Marcus Aurelius. Read here.

🤝 3 Pillars of Successful Communication: In this talk, I cover poor communication habits, how to express yourself well in all circumstances, and the model I use to manage conflict. Listen here.​​

🖼️ Can “Positive Reframing” Go Too Far?

In an ongoing series with Stoic writer Donald Robertson, I asked him if the technique of psychological reframing can ever be overused. Personally, I find that I am very skilled at transmuting setbacks and obstacles into opportunities for gratitude and growth, and I wanted to know if I should use this skill with caution.

🧰 Featured Technique: “The What If Method”

The "What If" Technique comes from Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), which is an effective, science-backed therapeutic system inspired by Stoic philosophy.

Even though the methodology of this technique is very simple, its power should not be underestimated. In fact, most Stoic techniques are deceptively simple but yield profound results when actually practiced.

At the root of our anxieties and self-defeating beliefs in general, there is often a terrifying fantasy. When you eventually confront this fantasy you will be able to overcome it. But very often this fantasy is elusive and hidden deep within the subconscious.

— Jon Brooks, Read Full Article Here

How to Practice the “What If Technique”

🧘‍♂️ New Course: The Stoic Survival Guide to Navigating Troubled Relationships and Toxic People

If you enjoy the free Stoic Handbook content, particularly the podcasts, but want to go deeper, I’ve created Stoic Handbook Premium, where you can enjoy my courses and exclusive Q&As and lessons.

The next course that I will be released is a 10-day deep dive into difficult relationships. It will be coming in 1 week and will join the existing course library, which features courses on social skills, anxiety, and resilience.

In this 10-day course, you will learn how to thrive in any type of relationship by using a combination of ancient Stoic techniques and modern relationship research principles. You will go on a journey where you’ll discover the classic signs of toxic abuse, the right way to deal with conflict, how to discard insults like a Stoic master, the most important tools for great communication, how to develop true compassion for yourself and others, and exactly what your next step should be regardless of the situation you’re in. This is course is designed to radically transform your relationships and the way you interact with others.

What people have said:

By far one of the most well planned, prepared and executed courses on Insight Timer that I have done. Not just that, the wonderful way in which Jon manages to connect eastern meditation practices, with Stoic meditations, coupled with cutting-edge and complex psychology from modern science; with what we know about the human mind, heart and soul connection today; that we did not know even as short as 50 years ago. Finally, a masterful delivery in the English language. Thank you for bringing to life my personal Stoic practice Jon, especially at a time when I thought I knew a thing or too

— Asim

So many great takeaways. I don’t have people in my life who are genuinely toxic but def appreciated tips such as EAR (empathy, assertiveness and respect) and the principles of NVC (non-violent communication). I also loved the idea of greeting an insult (even one that is largely harmless banter) with “embrace, exaggerate and laugh.” I tried this out just yesterday and it was spot on. 👏

— Katie

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🤝 Friend of Wisdom

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Thanks for reading, and I will be in touch soon!

(Fate permitting)

Jon

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